bluefluff's blue fluff

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Things that don't make sense #2

The BBC today tells the sad tale of a bloke who turned up for a job interview & ended up being interviewed live on air about the Apple court case, having been mistaken for a visiting expert. Poor bloke, what a dreadful & embarrassing experience for him... but... here's the mystery:
The producer asked for Guy Kewney, editor of Newswireless.net, who was due to be interviewed about the Apple vs Apple court case.
After being pointed in Mr Goma's direction by a receptionist, the producer - who had seen a photo of the real expert - checked: "Are you Guy Kewney?"
The economics and business studies graduate answered in the affirmative and was whisked up to the studio.


So, why did Mr Goma agree that he was Mr Kewney, when he wasn't?

PS What's a "data support cleanser" & do you have to know who you are, to be one?

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Things that don't make sense #1

First in an occasional series...

These aren't big questions, about war & peace or stuff like that - just little niggles. I keep finding myself reading news stories & ending up confused. Some things just don't make sense. Here's today's:

The BBC reports a house fire, caused by leaving a crystal ornament on a windowsill, where it magnified the sun's rays, setting fire to the curtains & windowsill. The local fire service warned people not to leave such ornaments where they could be subject to strong sunlight.

So far, so good. But here's the bit I don't get:

The fire was spotted by the owners of the house in Chapel Lane, Chew Stoke, when they came home on Saturday night.
They managed to put out the flames using a portable extinguisher.

The sun doesn't shine at night, does it? So how could the fire only just have started - still minor enough to put out with a domestic fire extinguisher - when they returned home on Saturday night? Or even on Saturday evening?

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Back to front

So now, people are so scared by the advice to put babies on their backs to sleep, that they're not letting them play on their fronts....makes you wonder how the human race ever survived before we had experts.
Maybe instead of worrying about flat heads, we should be worrying about pointy heads.

Pam on John

I don't normally read Tory politicians' blogs, but circumstances directed me off my usual track to collect this little gem! Pam Ayres' take on the John Prescott story appeared in the Telegraph earlier this week, but isn't available on their site. Reproduced here in case it soon isn't available on Mr Dale's site, either....

I am ready Mr Prescott
You can take me in your arms
All these years I've waited
To experience your charms
So fling aside those trousers
I hope they're quick release
For all that hanky panky's
Made you clinically obese

I like a man of substance
I like a man of size
Especially when I'm measuring
The bags beneath their eyes
If anyone insulted me
I have no doubt at all
You'd leap to my defence
And punch the blighter through the wall

I like you Mr Prescott
A constant watch I keep
To see you on TV
Sat next to Tony, fast asleep
So I'm waiting Mr Prescott
My toothbrush in my bag
To see your chiselled jaw
Behind the wheel of either Jag

A man like you is dangerous
A man like you is trouble
Just like a row of houses
You demolished me to rubble
With one hand on the tiller
As steady as a rock
And the other disappearing
Up the secretary's frock!


Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Our Austin again

Another instalment from the Grimsby MP's blog.

Blogging has been temporarily suspended for reconstruction work. On me. I'm still on painkillers but that gives me a much happier view of New Labour. I'm using the same brand as Tony so I know exactly how he feels - or doesn't - but I hope they don't have the same effect on my hair.

Last week was peak pain killer time. Prezza is near his three shags and you're out limit (he's actually well past it but the others kept quiet so as not to get expelled from the women's movement). Now he's in a position where he can't go because it's too humiliating but he can't accomplish anything by staying because he's so humiliated. Yet at least he got more from his Clinton moment than Clinton. I've always been his admirer since YTV days. But he is a serial groper and should keep his hands to himself.
& so on & so forth for another thousand words or so!